Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..