I'm gonna have a badass scar
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
Randomize
