I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
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