Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
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