was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
