she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
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