new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Randomize
