The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
Randomize
