I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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