she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Randomize