The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
Randomize
