Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
Randomize