i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
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