are you still at the devil's house?
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
No subtext here. People are naked.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Randomize
