I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
He's on the porch naked. Help.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize