She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
did you just send me my own nude
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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