my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
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