A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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