Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Randomize
