drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Randomize
