New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize