Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
