I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Randomize
