he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize