Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
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