Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize