Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
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