I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
Randomize
