Where did you get a picture of my penis
why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
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