Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
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