Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
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