I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Randomize
