Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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