u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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