She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
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