addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
How's work?
Spinning.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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