dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
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