i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
