Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
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