...so i touched it.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Randomize
