That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
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