Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
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They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
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πππ what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
I'm too high and old for this...
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
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