thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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