he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
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