Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
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