so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
