why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
