Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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