we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
