I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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