I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
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