glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Randomize
